I am trying very hard to stay optimistic on my journey. This test of nature vs. nurture that I somehow signed myself up for is like an amusement park ride.  I get dizzy.  I find myself one minute ecstatic at the prospect of what lay ahead and then one thing sets me off and I am questioning my own beliefs and purpose.

Constantly trying to keep myself uplifted can be a chore.  I love being happy and I love being positive but sometimes I am just plain grumpy.  Sometimes I let people and/or circumstances get the best of me.  Sometimes I let myself get the best of me! And if I am not careful my frustration can cover me in a veil of contention.

I get affected.  It’s true. I expect people to have integrity. To be honest. To be loyal.  To care.  I expect too much.  I expect too much of people and of myself.  If I could be granted one wish in life.  My wish would be that everyone achieve a state of empathy.  

In the meantime I shall choose to look on the bright side.

As a “people” we are far from flawless.  And that’s okay.  Our flaws give us character.  It’s our flaws that teach us how to be better but allow us to be human.  I am trying too hard. I care too much.  I know.  I always do and I always will.

Growing up knowing that whatever you did would never be good enough for the genius mother who birthed you is draining to say the least.  Of all the things I need to let go of in life this has created my biggest challenge.  This is not American Idol!  I need to stop judging!  I can just do my best, today.  Be who I am, today.  Feel what I have to feel, today.  Embrace the challenges.  Cuddle the accomplishments and finally let myself off the proverbial hook I have been hanging from.

Years ago I happened upon a book that would shed some light on my misguided youthful approach to the world.  Today I need to be reminded of the messages in this practical and insightful code for life.  I share them with you…

The Four Agreements by, Don Miguel Ruiz
agreement 1
Be impeccable with your word – Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

agreement 2

Don’t take anything personally – Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

agreement 3

Don’t make assumptions – Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

agreement 4

Always do your best – Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

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